There are only two groups of people
The current trend of shoving individuals into groups and assigning them a negative stereotype is both destructive to humanity and inaccurate. I’m trying to figure out if the interpersonal destruction or the ignorant inaccuracy is more annoying. It’s close for sure. For fun, let’s list a few groups and align their common stereotypes. I wonder if any of these statements feel true, and others offend you?
Corporations need to pay their fair share and exploit their workers for profit.
Liberals want to take our guns and spend all our money.
The NRA doesn’t care about people enough to give up their guns and therefore is directly responsible for gun violence.
The Catholic Church enables and supports assaults against children.
Democrats want to take away our rights and spend all our money.
Republicans don’t care about the little guy, women, the enviornemnt, or the LGBTQ community.
White men are born with toxic masculinity, suppress women have the deep-seated and unearned privilege.
Trump supporters are all racist, misogynistic, and xenophobic
LGBTQ people are …
Christians are …
Muslims are …
Unions are …
When you have children, as I do, these subjects take on a different meaning. When your kids ask you, “Dad, am I a bad person?” because they just heard someone state a negative stereotype that includes them, it forces one to take a fundamental stance and think through the rhetoric.
Our family has had many conversations about these topics and has worked through our philosophy towards all people. What stands out to me about this topic is all the assumptions in the above groups are true, but at the same time also definitely not true. Within these large swaths of humans, people fit those molds and give fodder to the stereotyping. But isn’t it reasonable to assume that some people don’t fit the negative stereotype?
Among the world’s 7 billion people, there are only two groups, good and bad people.
This may seem overly simplistic but stick with me for a minute. I use these two groups mainly for parenting and to provide my kids with a framework to think about people and make sense of the insanity in today’s highly charged and hostile judgy world. It’s surprising how many people get sucked into the vortex of identity politics and grouping people based on some label.
Let’s look at an example of one of the world’s largest organizations, the Catholic Church. It is more than 2,000 years old and has had individuals within its organization who have committed heinous acts against children and have had cover-ups at the highest level. Does this mean the entire Catholic Church is bad, and maybe all Catholics should take some responsibility for these crimes? It’s an emotionally charged topic.
My mother-in-law has had an on-and-off-again relationship with the Catholic Church. For the past ten years, it’s been one of the more important things in her life, including her faith, her community, and a platform to help others. Their work in our community and around the world is widespread and has helped millions of people, this is undeniable.
How does one reconcile how they feel about an organization that has both caused so much harm and has helped so many over the centuries?
This is the ultimate question and the purpose of my article. All of the groups listed above have a group of bad people that do horrible things. Still, based on my life experience and interaction with people from all these groups, I argue that a majority of the people in those groups are good.
Let’s try this on for size and see how it feels. Some Christians are jerks. Some gay men are jerks. There are Democrats AND Republicans that are jerks. They are anti-gun activists and NRA members that are jerks. Writing that out loud is liberating, and feels great to get that out there.
As long as we are playing and this is a safe space, let’s keep going. I know some amazing Christians. I also know some amazing gay men, and while we’re at it, I know some of the most generous, caring people that are Republican and Trump supporters. I also know this guy who’s probably the most thoughtful and balanced thinker I know, who is a Democrat.
Back to the idea of only two groups of people in the world, good and bad.
Good and bad are defined by people’s behavior and treatment of others, NOT the group they support or identify.
My definition is pretty straightforward and centered around the golden rule of treating others as you would like to be treated. Our behavior, and treatment of others, determine who is good and bad, NOT the color of our skin, gender, belief system, or what football team they support.
If you’re determined to say all Republicans/Democrats/White men/LGBTQ/Christian/Muslim people are “blah blah”, then you are being unfair, insulting, and most importantly inaccurate in your description of millions of people. I care more about “people” and individuals, and I find identity politics and mean-spirited stereotyping reprehensible.
There is also some solid irony here, and I always like some good irony. In my observation, many of the people making these ignorant stereotypes are themselves often in a group that feels unfairly judged because they view themself as an individual, not as the group stereotype. However, slinging a stereotype back towards another group is the same judgment they feel themselves.
Each group listed in this article have both good people and bad people, the groups themselves cannot be, and should not be, incriminated by a small group of bad apples in their respective group. Let’s judge people on their own merits, not on a group they subscribe too.
